Thursday, February 5, 2009

I think we are on the losing side....

Whining post ahead. Beware.

We used to joke about how we were apart more than we were together. I actually used to figure it out by days home vrs, days gone. But it got old real fast. Matt mentioned it today and I can't remember the exact dates of every trip, but here is a rough draft by month.

Some stuff on here is short stuff (45-90 days) That's cause we were staggered. He left for Korea after I left for PLDC. I was at NTC when he was home, but he was at PLDC when I got the actual separation was longer than the 45-90 days. But this does not include field problems of 4 weeks or less, mini schools etc.

1997- Presidio Ca-Married in July, Army finally let us move in together in Oct. (+3 -3)

1998-Aug PCS-Dana to Fort Sam TX, then Fort Hood TX. Matt to Goodfellow AFB TX, the Ft Huachuca (AZ) (+8 -4)

1999- Matt arrives at Hood, 6 days later Dana deploys to Bosnia, Matt goes to Peru gets back after Dana. (+2 -10)

2000 Bought a house (same one we live in now) Dana spends 4 months medical support in field, JRTC, PLDC, NTC Matt TDYs to Korea (when Dana is home) and hits JRTC and PLDC opposite cycles. (Forget exact dates positive estimate...+3 -9)

2001 Dana finally gets out. Matt has short trip to Korea. (+10 -2)

2002-Home till May(Connor is born), then 6 months of Jordan support then Korea in Nov (+5 -7)

2003-Korea all year. (+1 -11) *midtour is 30 days leave

2004-ANOC, short stop home, then Iraq for the rest of the year (Maddy is born) (+1.5 -10.5)

2005-Home in March (Maddie was 4 months old) (+9 -3)

2006-Left for Iraq October (preceded by JRTC etc since Aug) (+7 -5)

2007-Iraq(-12) *18 days home for R&R

2008-Home Jan 27th (except for TDY training) (+9 -3)

2009-Iraq Feb 5th (+1 -11)

I think we are in the negative again. Maybe I should add it up.
In the 11 years, 7 months we have been married ( 139 months ) we have been together for no more than 59.5 months at best. (remember the field problems!) That's barely 40%. LESS than 5 years....

Now I AM depressed.


  1. Hang in there. You CAN do it!

  2. Stop thinking about the time apart and think of all the good that came about while you were together. Look at what you already went thru, making it thru this one should be easy! Just stay positive and know that you can make it thru a day at a time!

  3. That is depressing. Sorry, I know I'm supposed to help buoy you up. But I think sometimes it also helps to acknowledge the pain. Go ahead and let it out. Give it a name. Your feelings are valid and real. You don't have to pretend they don't exist. What you can't do, however, is let them overpower you. Give the depression it's 5 minutes of fame and no more. We all need to know what military wives go through because those of us who don't experience it tend to take for granted all you sacrifice for us. Thank you!


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