Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Just plain ol' frustration.

I can't take it anymore. I am so fed up with my son's behavior and my inability to deal with him.

We are having a problem EVERY SINGLE DAY at school. Connor was talking. Connor wasn't doing his work. Connor was distracting other kids. Connor convinced the new kid to pee on the bathroom walls. (I'm not kidding; that was today.)

I just want to pick him up from school and go to the park. I want to give him a hug and say, "I'm glad you had a great day! Let's go home and play a game." Something positive. Something....Anything other than the embarassment of yet another day of "What happened this time?".

Even on the days when he doesn't get in actual trouble, his work isn't getting done. I know that it's not because he is a)dumb or b) the teacher is giving too much work. He just doens't pay attention and decides that he doesn't want to do it. He is no longer on the A honor roll because he refuses to follow direction. After 18 weeks of school, he knows that the standard is FULL sentences for Science, Reading, Math...EVERYTHING. If there is a question, it MUST be a full sentence. He just chooses to ignore that (along with any other direction that he doesn't feel like doing.)

I am ready to scream or cry or something. I'm trying really hard not to over react. I remember as a kid how my mom would get furious about something small and throw out a really stern punishment....then if I made another mistake....the punishment would become ridiculous because she wanted it to be harsher than the last....a never ending cycle that ended in resentment and NOT a behavior change. I figured that I'd be punished no matter what, so I did whatever I thought I might get away with. Even if I tried my best, she was mad. So I'm trying not to do that to my kids.

But it was hard. Today, I wanted to smack him upside the head right there and then. I wanted to take away the book he was reading and throw it in the trash and stand him in the corner for a week. I wanted him to really understand just how angry and frustrated and embarassed I was feeling. (I didn't realize that at the time, but I'm getting it now.)

I didn't do any of those things. Well, he stood in the corner while I looked through his bag and when I was talking to his teacher.

Now he is working on his unfinished work from school. No actual HOMEWORK, just five assignments that he just didn't do in class and a paper that he has to fix because once again....did not follow instructions. And I'm sitting here, venting to the blogosphere, feeling like I want to cry because I'm so frustrated and fed up.

And to think that today started out so well.

2 comments:

  1. That totally sucks!! I think what makes it even suck-ier is that Connor is boy wonder and has always showed above average IQ and study skills. So now that he's slacking its not just some average kid not getting his homework done....its CONNOR aka mr. smarty pants. Just remember, this is one of the only areas of his life that he can control right now. And it's gotta be tough on him (and you!) to be missing Matt. I love you sis! Keep your head up- he's a smart kid, he'll level out soon enough. :)

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  2. (((hugs))) don't be embarrassed! It happens to all of us parenting out here. Some days/years are better than others. Just continue to be involved and take him to the park/plan a special day with just you two. No strings attached...ie: good behavior or whatever. As parents we love unconditionally... but do our kids feel it with all our expectations/rules we hold them to?? so cry if you need to cry... yell if you need to yell... but don't forget to pray... ;) ((hugs))

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